Welcome to AVM survivors! It’s great you found us, though none of us envy being here!
What to add to what everyone else has said out loud?
I think it’s fair to worry about being “different” post op. I’m sure it is a risk (and in particular with the frontal lobe). As someone has said, I believe also that it may well depend on how large, complex, deep the AVM is and what will be disturbed through surgery of any kind. We do have info in the AVM 101 category about classifications of AVM. I can’t remember if 3cm counts as “large” but it doesn’t sound especially small to me, so again, it feels like an above-average risk.¹
However, maybe the way to think about this is that actually, life has changed with this discovery. The road ahead isn’t the seemingly nice, straight open road with what looks like great visibility of what is coming. Rather, the mirage has gone away and the unusual and unwelcome twists have been revealed, with a big fork in the road.
So, you’re not choosing to “stay the same” by not having an operation or to “take a risk” by having the op. Both routes ahead look less straight, in fact it’s difficult to see where either of them lead. Both have risks, they’re just rather different risks.
You say in your profile that you’re scheduled for a craniotomy. When is that? You’re obviously not quite comfortable with it (none of us are). Have you done enough asking of questions of your neurosurgeon about how they view the risks that you mention? I don’t know how second opinions work in Canada but a lot of people take multiple opinions into consideration before electing for an operation.
It is possible to obtain remote second opinions from the major US neurosurgery practices without travelling and without spending more than a few hundred dollars, if that is something that would help you to be more comfortable with going ahead.
Ask anything you want. This is what we are here for.
Best wishes,
Richard
¹ OK, so on looking, the grading system has 3cm as “small”, but borderline medium.