Scared to go crazy after surgery

I had anxiety disorder for years..since 1996, but it has gotten less over the years and during the last years it didn´t really effect my life. But since my craniotomy it came back...still not as severe as 15 years ago..but its there. I am anxious a lot..have often weird feelings or thoughts - oh i am not afraid that the AVM will come back..i am afraid that the surgery effected my psyche and that i might loose my emotions or that i wont be able to think "normal" such things...that I will go crazy...psychotic or schizophrenic... I know this are all very common symptoms of an anxiety disoreder, but I would be interested if anyone experienced such fears too....if they subsided or if soemone really got "crazy" - maybe I just need some more time to deal with everything - i am 8 weeks post craniotomy now...and when i think of it it still scares me whta happened. It traumaticed me and beside this big surgery I had, my father died 3 weeks after my OP.Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks to all of u.

Hi Manux - I'm unsure if a crainiotomy can make you crazy, but I do know that any kind of grief and loss (which is experienced by AVM, stroke, any disability really where you "lose" your old self) entails going through steps that will probably make you feel crazy - 1. denial, 2. anger, 3. bargaining, 4. depression, and 5. acceptance - not necessarily in that order. wow - I actually learned something from this experience =)...as if. Julie

Manux,
I don't know all the circumstances about your dad but I am sorry for your loss. On another note, I never feared going crazy after the crainiotomy but we're all different. Rather, I'll tell you that I haven't run into a member of this site who experienced that. But there are many variables that probably effect that. Probably the best course of action is to communicate your fears to your doctor (the one performing the crainiotomy) and see what he/she says. Good luck with the upcoming surgery and keep us all posted!

Hey girl! I too have generalized anxiety disorder and was over the hump with it before my surgery. I am having panic to the point that when i get upset, my speech is affected. I alos had seizures from being anxiety ridden. I see a psychiatrist next Friday... per my family doctor and neurologist the anxiety is what id causing these issues and it is probably exaggerated by the surgery. Keep in mind they moved the 3 main arteries in my head and 14 vessels. I am in fear of losing my sanity too as well as my spouse. I am very confused alot and require help. To him I look normal..The docs say it is going to be a year before I am truly normal me. I feel lost in my head and confused about how I feel about it. So, yes i have the same issue. The psychiatrist is to help me understand what is going on in my brain. I need to know.Keep youe xhin up girl!

Thank u so much....at least i don´t have panic attacks anymore , but i often feel simpy bad and i am afraid sth bad will happen, even if i don´t really know what. and then i often fear to loose my mind and everything seems so confusing and weird and my head is weird too.......i know these feelings already--they are usual symptoms from generalized anxiety disorders..and i think the surgery and everything else i had to go through this year effected this disorder to appear more again now.....I have good and bad days..on good days..everything is ok...no fears, no weird thoughts or bad feelings - but on bad days its realy bad. I hope it will get better again too. Best wished to u..hope u will feel better too....pls keep me informed what ur doc told u. Thanks and greets ur way.

I have had so many issues, even had to go in and have another angiogram to make sure I am ok. I am going to see a psychiatrist and a neuropsychologist soon for testing and treatment. My angio was fine. I am still having issues call me if you need to talk to someone who understands(816)■■■■■■■■! Thanks!

You have been through so much in a short period of time, it’s no wonder that you feel anxious. I think it would help to talk to a professional about the things you are feeling. It’s too much to handle on your own. I am so sorry about the loss of your father. Hang in there.