Indecision

So my AVM was in my cerebellum, which is the part that controls balance, coordination and planning. Sometimes I do have trouble planning like what to do in a day or the order of things that I have to do to get somewhere, but those are small things in the grand scheme of things. I'm having trouble making a decision on what to do with my life now. I don't know how much my "planning" ability has been affected by this or it's just me being wishy-washy about things, but I'm having a very hard time trying to decide what to do with myself and what is the best way to get there.

I need to move out of my current rental situation because I simply can't afford it any more, but I can't make a firm decision about where and how to go about doing this!! I think that I've thought it out and come to a decision about it, but I start to have serious regrets and then people tell me their opinion and they have really great points and I end up changing my mind. And what looked like a really great decision at the time starts to look like a bad decision. And this indecision has cost me financially now, I ended up making a hasty decision while I was in a panicked state of mind (and also a pre-migraine aura of mental shakiness) and then changed my mind once I calmed down.

I spent the last few years trying to get where I am now and this AVM thing really blew my plans out of the water. I never wanted to move back "home" but it looks like the logical thing to do. But it also seems like admitting defeat., that this AVM got the best of me and won. And I don't want to give up on myself and retire to the desert (I'm only 33!!). And home is only a word, I only have one cousin out there and a couple of friends so home really isn't "home", it's just a cheap and safe alternative to the scary unknown of the future. And I'm not one to settle for safety!! So this is going against every fiber of my being, but it seems a very logical move.

My head tells me to move somewhere cheap, closer to family and friends and the safety of the known. But my heart and my uncle and a good friend are all screaming "NOOOOO don't do it!!" Seriously, my uncle told me not to go towards the light!! Meaning don't move back home!! But it's cheap and familiar... Ugghh!!

And I feel really blessed to even have this decision to make, this thing could have wiped me off the face of the earth, but it didn't so I feel a bit of survivor's guilt I guess, and that I should be happy with whatever decision I come to and maybe I should just move home and live an easy life. Or in the name of those who lost all their options, I should take a leap of faith and keep on with my original plans. But I just seem to be caught in an endless loop between these 2 decisions....

I hate being so indecisive!!!!!!!

Hello Nicole, I do know what you are going through....after 12 wonderful years with 'the love of my life' he decided that he didn't want to live with me anymore. For the last few weeks, I felt like a very crazy woman. I looked at flat after flat still hoping my husband would change his mind which he did as often as his undies! In the end, with my head done in, I went and got a little studio that i can afford (just) and I believe its the best thing that I have done. I know your situation is different but I too have planning skill problems and what a mess it was to pack!! Fortunately, I have family c;ose who helped me, though had wanted me to live with them but it didn't feel right for me. This is MY place and I can ddo whatever I want to do. You know that you have to do what is best for you; for me, I went with the heart and whilst I miss my husband so much, I also have peace at last.

I send you positive thoughts, prayers and the strength to make YOUR decision, whichever way it goes.xx

11

oops

Hi Nicole. I had totally forgotten that during my operation…my Father and boyfriend (now husband) packed up all my things out the apt. and put them in storage. My lease was up the day of the operation. As it turned out…I had a friend who had a condo with a separate bedroom with bathroom attached that I ended up staying with her after the operation. I did not want to move back in with the folks. Good Luck with the decision.

Hi Nicole. What ever you decide to do, I think you should make your decision on… What’s going to make you happy. Sorry, I don’t have any more to offer.

Thanks everybody!!! I really thought about getting a dart board and just throwing a dart and doing whatever it said, but the decision has been made without the use of chance or randomness!! I'm moving back "home" and I want to be happy about it, I really do! But all I can seem to focus on is the part about defeat... And everybody also likes to point out how bitter and defeatist I sound, ARRGGHH!!! And then I talked it out to death and frustrated and angered everybody with my indecisiveness. ARRRGGGGHH!!

Thanks!!!