Hi Danielle,
I live alone but, I don't know what you mean by "A lot of thoughts" ?
Ben
Hi Danielle..i guess when u say "lot of thoughts"...u mean the avm survivor accumulates lot of unexpressed views n thoughts as he is unable to match the speeds of common man..n finally tends to get hurt emotionally n accumulates frustrations n slips into depression... n then finally end up living alone ..not ready to gel with anyone....
if this is your questions...yes please add me to the TOP of THAT LIST... :)
Hi Danielle...I live alone as well! As Ben said, please explain what you wrote, "A lot of thoughts". I think I know what you are saying, but write back and explain. Thanks, Louisa
HOLY SMOKES THANK YOU!! As you know I am typing for Bootsie (and myself) but the way broke all of that down for me & him...SO RIGHT ON!!! He has such trouble expressing the thoughts and feelings...and his frustrations have put him into a bit of depression at times. He has trouble "geling" with people..sometimes he just wants to be alone...most time he wants to be alone. Fortunately with the help of you and all others on this site, he knows that how he is feeling is "normal" or better yet ...not crazy. His sadness i feel comes a lot from not knowing who he is now...he doesnt love or feel excited about much of anything that he used to...he cant connect. Where do you find your joy? How do you find your joy?...i would love for Bootsie to feel some joy again...
okay. Now I know what you mean by your question.
I'm a strong believer of writing in a journal. It's a harmless way of expressing your feelings and it allows you to 'get it out of your system' and not be judged for your opinions. It sounds to me that Bootsie is having some depression. I've been there, done that... :)
I don't do well with crowds any more. Even stores that are busy bother me. So I stick to smaller groups of people and I don't go in a store that's crowded. If I do go, I'm only good for about 5 minutes. Then I have to leave. I was never liked this before. Heck, I used to be a DJ at one time. I sure couldn't do that job any more.. lol
Tell Bootsie: He is not crazy! If he were, then we all would be (ha ha). Just because we don't enjoy things the way we use to, does not mean we are crazy. It simply means we don't enjoy it the way we once did.. that's all. We outgrew it (so to say).
Tell him to do the same thing I do. Play. Try different things and see what you like. If you don't like it, don't do it again. There's no harm done.
Ben
I want to add:
It takes time, time for us to re-find ourselves. My life was turned upside down when I got ill. I had a good paying job and I loved to work, I was active, I was always doing things with my friends and working on my house. I enjoyed life.
Then I became disabled. I got a whole knew life style that I WAS NOT prepared for. I was having seizures almost every day when my problems first started. Since I'm use to living alone and doing things myself. It was hard for me to ask anyone for help. I pretty much stayed to myself for quite a while. Eventually, things improved and now I learned to appreciate even the smallest of things. I think appreciation is the key. No matter how down I got - I would remind myself of the good things in my life. Such as: my friends, my family, my house being paid off. Anything and everything I could think of. Basically - I gave myself a pep talk. And.. IT WORKED! :)
Bootsie - Give yourself a pep talk. Be your own best friend. Take yourself out to eat. Buy yourself some ice-cream. Look in the mirror and say (a few times a day): "I love myself!" Sure. You won't believe it at first but, eventually it will sink in (wink). :)
Ben
Thank you so much!! Bootsie says thanks...hes tired today but grateful.